Ok, get your minds out of the gutter!
But Brad and I were having our morning coffee, house empty save our dogs barking at every possible noise from a squirrel rummaging for acorns, to the kids across the street getting in their cars, and he was looking for a YouTube video that would explain how to wire a particular project he wanted to do. As he watched more and more videos he was getting angrier and angrier at each. They were so perfect, these people made everything so easy that it started to tick Brad off massively. That is when we said WE would do a YouTube video, an honest one and we began to act out exactly how a real video should go, complete with all of the dammits, son of a bitches, OW, I just banged my heads and what the hell do you mean I need such and such a tool for the job??? Now I have to run to the store AGAINs! Many of Brad's DIY projects send him to Lowe's multiple times. We were laughing too hard at our vision of how a true video should go. I even said we needed to add in our youngest as the laugh track because that child of ours laughs maniacally when one of us hurts ourselves (not seriously of course) and screams a swear or two. Some of her favorite times would be recounting when one of us got hurt, like "hey mom, do you remember the time you hit your head on the speaker on the boat and you said "that's one" because you knew you'd be doing it multiple times??" Cut to the vision of said child laughing until she is bright red and unable to speak as she tries to spit out the story.
Off track again, typical of my mind these days. I am putting my thoughts down as they come up so you can see how a person with MS gets easily distracted. Back to our regularly scheduled blog~
Then I said to Brad. YouTube videos are the essence of social media. I don't think I have ever logged in to Facebook, Instagram etc. and not have something smack of insincerity. The whole look at me, I am living this fabulous life and you aren't thing. The other thing that gets me is when someone nowadays gets engaged, married or pregnant. Holy cow, you can't do any of the above without a cutesy hashtag and/or website to go with it.
I routinely say out loud, "How in the world did we ever do any of those things without hash tagging it and having a full pictorial or website of said event??" My girls always counter back with "that's life now" and I sound like an old fart whenever I bemoan such actions. I am like that old guy who yells at the kids sneaking in his yard to get their ball that went over the fence hahahaha! I know it's what everyone does anymore, it doesn't mean I understand it. I say a million times when I see a perfunctory shot of the engagement ring, "ok great it's a beautiful ring BUT have you thought of the happily ever after part? After you get over your sparkly ring, saying Yes to your Dress and planning the bash of the century, have you ever thought of the hard work it takes to stay married?" Judging by divorce rates now I am guessing no. Once again, I am that old person screaming at the kids going in my yard lol!!
Then my thoughts about the appearance of social media makes me compare it to living with MS. Outwardly? I look good, especially if I am just sitting still. You would never know I am in pain, yes my legs hurt like hell if I stand on them too long. I have this whole MS hug thing going on. My left side right under my boob burns so badly it feels like someone is putting a cigar out there and it feels like I am being squeezed sometimes too (hence the whole hug moniker). I have learned how to wear camis and baggy shirts so no one can tell I cannot wear a bra anymore. It hurts too much and makes me glad now that I am a card carrying member of the IBTC. At least I don't have to deal with hefty boobs that need support! You would never know what I am dealing with. Everything looks so wonderful.
I even had an inconsiderate neighbor once say to me, "well, you don't look sick". Yeah that's because you don't see the lightheadedness and spinning that occurs all of the time that makes me nauseous. You don't see me having to sit after I shower because the difference between the warm shower and the cooler air outside is enough to make my legs buckle (bet you never even considered that when you get out of the shower). But yes, I do have things going on and outwardly I look like everything is hunky dory. Maybe I don't want to be sick, or hobble around like I am. I hate nothing more than having to use a cane in public.
So you're right, I suppose I don't. And I suppose YouTubers have to do a million takes to make everything look so perfect and easy. And most people on social media are posting because they are truly happy and want to share it with the world. And me having MS doesn't make me sick, just a person navigating her life and all that goes with it.
In every walk of life each man puts on a personality and outward appearance so as to look what he wants to be thought; in fact you might say that society is entirely made up of assumed personalities ~ Francois de la Rochefoucauld
No comments:
Post a Comment